


Heal Me From Myself

by goddhyuck



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anxiety, Crying, Light Angst, M/M, Showers, Sleepy Cuddles, im stressed so i wrote this instead of doing work, its finals season babey!, they shower and its pg, yukhei is not having a good time folks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:40:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21602377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goddhyuck/pseuds/goddhyuck
Summary: Yukhei is stressed. Johnny is there to help him, as much as he can.
Relationships: Suh Youngho | Johnny/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas
Comments: 1
Kudos: 94





	Heal Me From Myself

**Author's Note:**

> barely proof read. wrote this in abt an hour. i am yukhei

Yukhei was fucking exhausted. He wanted to run into the middle of the road and scream, maybe get hit by a car if he was lucky. He also wanted to sleep for a solid 18 hours, or to eat an entire horse. Who knows, really. All he wanted was to be doing anything but this.

He had two weeks left. Two weeks until finals. Two weeks until he was done with this bullshit for a month, and then he's back at it again. 

You see, Yukhei was struggling. One of his professors decided it would be great to throw a goddamn _project_ at his students, giving them two weeks to complete a full research paper, a presentation to go with it, and wanted them to set up a time slot with him _before_ finals to present it.

This was shit on so many levels for Yukhei. First, his professor's office hours were generally during the mornings, and he is not a morning person. Meaning that his presentation has to be god tier in order for his professor to not kill him on sight. Second, it's history, and he has to include at least 10 primary sources in his paper to even consider getting above a C. Third, history was Yukhei's worst subject. He usually spent the most time on this class while studying, He also usually met with a tutor or had his boyfriend quiz him constantly, yet he still got an average of low B's. Not the best.

Lastly, it was _two weeks_ before finals. Meaning that all of his other classes were absolutely shit and crazy busy as well, trying to wrap up the end of the semester and cram in all of the leftover content that didn't properly make its way into the lesson plan yet is still on the fucking final.

Again, Yukhei was not having a good time.

He leaves his tiny dorm for classes and that's about it. He hadn't seen his boyfriend in the past two weeks, both too busy trying not to drown in work. He also feels sick to his stomach from a combination of shitty food and coffee to keep fueling him without wasting time on something stupid, like making himself a decent dinner that doesn't just consist of some frozen microwave meal that he found on sale.

Currently, Yukhei is actually hiding away in the library, headphones on, hood up, a fucking gallon of water next to him, and surrounded by different books, scattered papers, pens, and his laptop. Overall, he looks like a goddamn disaster, but no one spares him a second glance. No one gives a shit, its college, college nearing finals. Nothing is abnormal anymore.

He loses track of time. He's barely made progress on his paper as the librarian rounds the corner and glares at him, telling him to leave and that the library is closed for the night.

_Fuck._

Once he gets back to his dorm, it's nearly midnight. He still hasn't eaten lunch or dinner, only having a bag of chips to get through studying in the library.

And he is nowhere near done with his project. He has to get it done asap or he risks half-assing it and being murdered by his professor. Not good.

Whatever, he'll just… keep working on it tonight. See where it goes. He felt as if he was finally getting somewhere with everything and he didn't want to let that go to waste.

So he sits down at the shitty desk in the corner of his room and gets to work again. He tries, he really does, he tries so fucking hard to understand his topic, to get it to make sense and put it into coherent words in his paper but it just wasn't fucking working.

Maybe he just needs a break. He doesn't even glance at the time as he slips on his shoes, grabs his keys, and walks out the door. 

His plan? Go to the corner store. Get snacks. Maybe buy McDonald's on his way back, and get back to work.

The corner store is where Johnny finds him.

Shaking silently in the snacks aisle of the corner store, on the floor, hunched over, head buried between his knees. He seemed to be crying if the choked off noises were anything to go by.

"Baby?"

Yukhei jerked his head up, wiping at his eyes trying to wipe away his tears, but they were still streaming down his face. He lets out another choked sob as he reaches out for Johnny.

Johnny joins him on the floor, pulling him into his lap as best as he can, letting Yukhei bury his head into his shoulder and continue sobbing. Johnny knows the kid at the cash register can probably hear them, but he doubts the boy actually cares.

He rubs the other boys back, moving side to side to try and calm him down.

"Let's get you home, okay? We'll get you something to eat later."

Yukhei just nods his head, staying settled in Johnny's lap, trying to stop his tears. 

They stand up together, and Yukhei keeps his head down as they walk out of the store, clinging onto Johnny's arm like he would die if he let go. It feels like he would.

Johnny's apartment is much larger than Yukhei's dorm is. They head to Johnny's room, and Yukhei immediately climbs under the covers of the bed as soon as he gets the chance, hiding his face in the pillows.

"Xuxi, can you tell me what happened? We haven't talked recently I need you to talk, baby."

Yukhei sniffled, turning to Johnny, who sat on the edge of the bed with a hand on top of the human-sized lump under the covers. "They were out of my favorite snacks,"

Johnny hummed, nodding understanding. "What else, baby? We're alone now, you can cry again, just let it all out and let me help you."

So Yukhei spilled. His voice was shaky, and he made it a few minutes without crying. He mentioned the shitty, shitty project, how much it's frustrating him, how he doesn't understand it, how his tutor isn't available right now, how all of his other work is piling up right now. He talks about missing home and knowing he can't go back over break is hurting him as well, he cries about how fucking _disgusting_ he feels, how he hasn't showered in days, how he hasn't eaten a proper meal in so long.

And Johnny listens, he doesn't interrupt, only offering quiet support and gentle hums, encouraging Yukhei to keep talking. 

Once he's done, he's a mess. Tear stains all over his face, throat sore and nose running. His hair is a mess, greasy and sticking in every direction. Johnny wants to do everything he can to help. So he does.

"Give me a second, Xuxi."

He grabs him a glass of water, and starts the shower on his way back, giving it time to warm up.

"Alright, come on, we're gonna get you cleaned up and fed and then you're gonna sleep, nice and cozy. We'll work on your project _together_ tomorrow, does that work?"

Yukhei nods, sniffling as he walks toward the bathroom. Johnny hands him a towel and gets ready to leave, but is stopped by the hand on his wrist.

Yukhei is a bit flushed, avoiding eye contact. "Please help me… I don't…"

"Of course, Xuxi, come on."

Johnny helps him undress before doing so himself, stepping into the shower and guiding Yukhei in. 

It's peaceful. The warm water doesn't cover both of them, but it somehow works out well. It's something they've done before, although in different circumstances. Yukhei stands under the spray, unmoving as he stares at the shower tiles, exhausted.

Johnny runs his hands through the other boy's hair, making sure it's all wet, before grabbing his shampoo and massaging it into his scalp. He's more thorough, taking his time knowing that Yukhei just wants to be taken care of right now since he can't do it himself.

"You're okay," he mutters, hearing Yukhei let out another broken sob, watching his shoulders shake with each wave of tears. He keeps washing the other boy's hair, making sure to be extra careful, working out the knots and covering all of it. 

He gets the boy to turn around and detaches the showerhead to rinse his hair out.

They keep going like that, Yukhei eventually calming back down and going limp in Johnny's arms, barely keeping himself standing. Johnny keeps going anyways, massaging the body soap into the other boys back, over his arms, trying to get his muscles to relax even more, to get rid of all of the tension in the boy's body.

Once they're done, he shuts the water off and helps position Yukhei on the toilet seat and dries him off with the softest towel he owns, drying himself off after.

He even goes the extra mile and blow-dries Yukhei's hair, running the comb through it.

Yukhei shuffles into Johnny's room again, and grabs sweats out of his dresser, pulling them on and climbing under the covers.

"I'll wake you up here in a few when I'm done cooking you dinner, okay? And then we can cuddle and sleep for the rest of the night."

Johnny ends up feeding Yukhei dinner himself, bringing little forkfuls of food to his mouth and repeating until it's all gone. Yukhei seemed too zoned out to do it himself and Johnny certainly didn't mind, not one bit.

He didn't bother to clean the kitchen up, just leaving everything on the counter to wash up the next day. His boyfriend takes priority.

He switches the light off and climbs under the covers. Yukhei wiggles around, resting himself halfway on top of Johnny, tangling their legs together.

"Goodnight, Xuxi. I love you," he kisses the top of the boy's hair.

"G'night, love you too."

They doze off like that, Yukhei still not feeling his best with the looming stress of finals and the disaster of a project he has waiting at home. But he does feel better, significantly better, considering that he was clean, he was well fed, and that he was getting to cuddle with his boyfriend, falling asleep surrounded by things that just screamed comfort.

**Author's Note:**

> im tired,,,  
> heres a [quick playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7ipbwIzPTa4vktMtJC7G0N?si=JUGixSgPTcqpfzCZyMcD_Q) i made for this fic including songs that comfort me and songs that i think just generally fit the vite.  
> good luck with finals, everyone (ig,, midterms? idk man)  
> had smth like this on my mind for a while, so i decided to write it rn cuz i am stressed and trying to avoid doing work. i hope everyones doing alright and that this holiday season is nice for you all.  
> please take care. :)
> 
> [twitter!](https://twitter.com/athenhyuck)  
> [cc!](https://curiouscat.me/athenhyuck)


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